From 25 November (the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women) to 10 December (Human Rights Day), the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence Campaign is a time to galvanize action to end violence against women and girls around the world. This year’s theme is to “End Gender-Based Violence in the World of Work”. These 16 days we will be sharing the stories of our very own ‘Siyani Sahelian’ (Wise Friends) who have faced violence and freed themselves through education. There are many more like them but they are faceless; these have come to the forefront due to their deeds and images.
My name is Humaira Farhan. I am 12 years and live in a joint family system in Muzaffargarh, South Punjab. Since even before my birth, my grandmother always scolded my mother for not giving birth to a son. My mother has two daughters, and daughters are considered worthless next to a son in our society. My father was part of this psychological abuse, frequently scolding my mother for not giving him a son and calling her ‘manhoos’ (cursed).
My studies stopped after I finished grade four due to the continuous tense environment at our home and the ‘burden’ on my family of my sister and I. My father laid the order that I don’t need formal education and only need to learn to cook and clean as that is a woman’s place in life. It was heartbreaking to see my own father valued me so little.
My mother, sister and I were the only support we had. My mother did not want us to end up like her and always taught us to dream. She taught us that we could change our family’s perceptions of girls by proving our worth ourselves. By the time my sister and I were strong enough to fight the family for education, it was too late for formal education and we prayed for alternate means. Hearing about the Siyani Sahelian program offered by ITA was an answer to our prayers: we could attain an education and work towards proving our family wrong!
My grandmother and father’s objections had now escalated to violence and threatening behavior, but we did not give up our fight. We will challenge the patriarchal society in Pakistan and teach society that the birth of a daughter is not a tragedy.
*Note: Names have been changed to protect the identity of the mentioned persons.
Disclaimer: The views expressed here are those of the authors and do not necessarily represent the views of Idara-e-Taleem-o-Aagahi (ITA) |